Yankees (Cessa 0-3 4.18 ERA) @ Twins (Colon 2-8 8.14 ERA)

Bartolo’s comeback game is upon us, and I’m happy for him, but he’s got to know when it’s time to hang the cleats. We all saw how terrible he was playing in Atlanta earlier this season, and he continues to SUCK. In his lone start for the Twins AAA team, he pitched 3.2 innings, and let up 4 runs on 4 hits, in a loss. I understand that Big Sexy wants to die on the field, but guy, you seriously might die on the field. A man of your stature and age should not be exerting and adding more stress on that blob you call your body. And with your income you should be retired down in Miami crushing some fruity adult beverages on the beach. Dalé. I understand Cessa doesn’t have a win on the season, but I think he gets an easy win against a Minnesota team that struggles at home and a pitcher whose arm is going to disintegrate.

Yankees ML -133

Dodgers (Kershaw 14-2 2.18 ERA) @ White Sox (Gonzalez 4-8 5.15 ERA)

Another day with Kershaw on the mound means another day of free money. This man is lights out, and Gonzalez is going to get his “tits lit” (shoutout Keith Hernandez, you legend). Gonzalez hasn’t seen the mound in over a month, he’s gotta be a little rusty, and even in his last 3 starts he’s 0-3 with an 8.62 ERA. The Dodgers are by far the hottest team in baseball (9-1) in their last ten. Tonight they’re playing in Chicago which means the Dodgers will have a DH in the lineup to aid the offense in gaining even more run support for the best pitcher in baseball. There’s been a lot of senseless killings in Chicago recently, and there’s going to be another one tonight when the Dodgers SLAUGHTER the stinky White Sox.

Dodgers -1.5 -175 2u*

Image taken from: https://www.baseballessential.com/news/2016/10/06/making-controversial-case-best-pitcher-baseball/